experiencessssss

calamaties, tribulations , test and test. hardship.

sometimes Allah want us to see.
What is like to feel helpless.
like when no ones couldnt hear you
or be there for you. comfort you and listens to you.
.
.
And with hardship. You finally knew it. How is it like to feel when nobodysss there.
to...
help,cure,listens and comfort you.

So now, you go to Allah.
wondering if HE can fill you up
Suddenly you get surprised with the results.

That 'emptiness' that you longing for so long is now have been filled.
now
you feel comfort a bit.
and...
when all the hardships gone
you start to forget who is the one that take it away.
You think that it is your effort.

and suddenly you forgetten that you've prayed to Allah.
and asked. to removes those calamaties.
so you forget HIM
again.
YOU FEEL MESS UP AGAIN THIS TIME.
its like.. you cant even focus in ur life.
so you try to find those 'fill' and perhaps it could fill you again, like before.

searching. and searching.
all the hardship is gone but those heart is like... yearning for something.

and you try to fill that up with music, people and worldly materials.
perhaps it will be the cure.
And yes, it can fill you up.
you finally relief.
But when the night comes..
you all alone.
you put on ur music again. perhaps it could fill that emptiness or that 'lonely' moments.
perhaps some hardcore music could help. or any sentimental music to make ur mind relax.
.
.
and finally your phones just dead.
now what?
you all alone in ur world
feeling empty. feeling lost.
that music couldnt helps you anymore
It just gone.
so you go to people. to fill you up.
or cheer you up.
finally they gone. and you all alone again.
and you go to places that maybe could cure those disease
and suddenly those places just gone with disaster.
and now you have nothing. nothing to fill you up
And now you return to Allah.
Allah , fill me up please , Im just lost.
cant help myself.
And Allah take away your sight and your hearing.

take away your fam too.
You was like. what is this? Dont you love me Allah?
Allah.. all I ask is to fill me up.
thats all. but why you took that away.
you questioned it. again and again.
But still, you couldnt find those answers.
so you cry and beg to Allah.
Allah please return my sight and hearing.
But still no answers

You dont give up. theres something in ur hearts that forces you to ask Allah more and more.
so you do that.
Ask Allah. again and again.

month after month.
year after year.

begging.
to Allah.
crying at the middle of night.
every seconds, every minutes.
Allah.. please. return it.
thats all you ask every seconds.
Your day cant be passes without you asking Allah.
And now you realizes that.
woo wait a minute. where all those emptiness? I mean that emptiness that I ask Allah to fill me up before?It just gone.

And you keep on thinking. what is happening here.
And you realizes that its because you remember Allah so much until you cant even feel that emptiness in ur heart.
It just fill you up.
even with those simplest dua.

Now you feel content. you feel bless with hardships that come to you.
And you found those answers.
Allah, without you im empty and i couldnt breath :).